Evanescence: My Immortal Meaning
Song Released: 2003
My Immortal Lyrics
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is...
↓ See the rest of these lyrics ↓
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1TOP RATED
anonymous Sep 5th 2007, 23:13 report
Perhaps some people read a death theme into the lyrics because of the loss of Amy's sister, and mistakenly believing that Amy wrote it. However, feeling the presence of a loved one after death usually brings comfort, not a wish that they'd go away and leave you alone. Nor would death be a reason to resent having been alone "all along." Death generally results in temporary anger over them having left AFTER they die.
Regardless as to what the original intent of an author is, quite often they will later read something they've written and realize that their subconscious has added multiple levels of meaning to their work. Most artists are aware of the possibilities, no, probabilities of this occurring.
To me, this song could be about a lover, a friend, a parent, a child, a grandparent...or any other person that is loved but takes or even destroys in return. This story is kind of told in reverse, beginning with her/his feelings and then giving us clues as to "why."
Most importantly, it seems to be more about losing one's own sense of identity and self-worth due to the loss and/or betrayal of a loved one than about the actual loss of the loved one--in fact, the desire is that the loved one just go away (taking all the painful love and memories with them.)
"I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears"
She (or he) is emotionally drained and paralyzed by fear--by the end of the lyrics, I'd probably define the fears in terms of the psychological state known as "learned helplessness"
"And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone"
She is constantly tormented by memories he left behind.
"These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase"
He hurt or betrayed her in a way that she can never forget or recover from the emotional damage.
"When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me"
Out of love, she sacrificed her life to his well-being and in return, he took her life with him (emotionally/metaphorically) when he left.
"You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind"
She has and always will be imprisoned by him: First it was willingly out of love (captivated by his light); but now she is entrapped by despair (bound by loss and lies)
"Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams"
A face she loved (trusted) has incomprehensibley become the face of her tormentor. A dream morphing into a nightmare.
"Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me"
His words before leaving callously revealed the truth; his deceptions, her delusions, and destroyed her sense of reality.
"I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along"
She is struggling with the reality that she was all alone in her love when he was with her...and ironically, now that he's left her, she isn't alone: He torments her with the memories of his betrayal (perhaps complicated by her genuine love for who she thought he was.) -
2TOP RATED
anonymous Nov 25th 2006, 19:29 report
Songwriter, singer, whoever...this song was written/sung from the perspective of someone who cannot get over the loss of a lover who swept her (or him) off her feet ("You used to captivate me...") and later walked away, leaving her devastated. The heartbroken person wanders lost and alone around their once happy home and is constantly bombarded with reminders from the past. ("...if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave 'cause your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone.") She remembers all the times she stood by her loved one ("...I'd wipe away all of your tears...", "...I'd fight away all of your fears...", etc). She is frustrated with herself for still being in love with that person and willing to do anything for him, even though he never really loved her the same way in return ("I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone, but though you're still with me, I've been alone all along.")
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3TOP RATED
bella dea Sep 6th 2005, 08:29 report
"I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone"
This is the pain of watching someone you love die and not be able to do anything about it. Being afraid of losing them, of the pain that comes from losing someone. Watching someone hang on when physically they are there but mentally they are gone.
"These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase"
Expression of human suffering when someone you love dies.
"When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me"
She was there for this person, through the pain, the suffereing the fear. She has been there always and even though this person will be gone soon, they still have her whole heart.
"You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me"
Again, this is the mentality of someone watching the one they love die. All she can think about is the times that he was well. She is feeling resentment for still hanging onto these memories. She is feeling angry and sad because she can't let go of the past.
"I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along"
She is trying to convince herself to let go because she knows that he cannot be with her in any way. And she has felt the burden all alone in this. She wants to let go before he dies but she can't.
This song is raw emotion about watching someone you love die and not be able to do anything about it. It's feeling sadness, resentment, anger and fear all at the same time. -
This interpretation has been marked as poor. view anyway
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evildarkness2666 Aug 18th 2005, 15:13 report
This song was written by Ben Moody when he was a teen (around 16), he was in love with Amy and he wrote it for her. This song describes the way he felt about her as they were kids growing up together. I know this because the producer (David Fortman) of this song and the Fallen CD is a good friend of my moms and he got to know the band pretty good. Anyway, that's what the song means, I'm almost positive.
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anonymous Aug 19th 2005, 23:00 report
It's about a woman who has a child. She cares for him, wipes away his tears when he cries, and protects him when he screams out of fear. All those years of being a mother, it is hard to forget the child when he died.
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ThelyricalAlkemist Sep 6th 2005, 22:45 report
This song is about someone who is so in love with someone that has broken up with them and the person is so in love they can't move on no matter wut the person they love still there. Everything that goes through the person's head is the one they love. They remember everything about them.
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anonymous Oct 5th 2005, 22:12 report
I believe the song is about someone who is actually still with their significant other, but they have hurt the narrator so much, the relationship is broken.
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lolabrt Nov 2nd 2005, 17:16 report
This song is apparently about a deceased lover ("I tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone, but though you're still with me, I've been alone all along"), but singer Amy Lee can probably relate to most of the lyrics as her three-years-younger sister, Bonnie, tragically died when she was younger.
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anonymous Feb 3rd 2006, 22:49 report
She's talking about a guy who used to be her light her everything until the day he left leaving her along ... It's possible that she's having trouble letting go but no matter what he will always have all of her.
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anonymous Feb 8th 2006, 15:27 report
Did anyone every think it could be about an abusive parent? Or maybe a mentally ill parent? Just a thought :)
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anonymous Apr 10th 2006, 20:09 report
I think that this song had plenty of different meanings. I had no idea that Amy didn't even write this song. I thought that this song was about Amy's little sister, but I really don't know anymore. The feeling I get everytime I listen to it is definently loss.
(Theses wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just to real, there's just to much that time can not erase)
I think that those lyrics explain the most. I think( Lets just say Amy) has lost someone extrememly close to her, and her wounds aren't healing from the loss, her pain is getting even stronger than it was before, and time cannnot take away what had happened.
(You cried I'd wipe away all of your tears, you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears, I held your hand through all of these years, but you still have all of me)
I think those lyrics are juts saying that she cared dearly for that person, and that she did everything for them. When that person died, it was hard for Amy to move on knowing that she was truly gone I think the last part "You still have all of me" means that Amy lost that person, but that person is still watching over her, and still has all of her.
This is on of the bands best songs, and I don't know what it's real meaning is, but it's a reall nice song to listen to. Amy's voice is incredible!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -
anonymous Apr 25th 2006, 04:41 report
This song is about someone who has died or left and this other person can't tell him/her how they feel.. If that makes any sence..
"and if you have to leave I wish that you would just leave cause your presents still lingour here and it wontleave me alone"
is saying the presents of another person is still with him/her and its invading their mind
"your face it haunts, my once plesent dreams"
is saying she/he can't even sleep without thinking of this person and they just want to get them out of their head to move on with their life. -
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anonymous Jul 19th 2006, 16:37 report
This song is about her little sister who died, she was only a child when it happened and the memory of that day and her sister are still fresh in her memory, which explains these lyrics:
"i'm so tired of being here
suppressed by all my childish fears
and if you have to leave
i wish that you would just leave
'cause your presence still lingers here
and it won't leave me alone...
These wounds won't seem to heal
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase"
and these lyrics explain all the things an older sibling would do for a younger one:
"when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears
when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears
and I held your hand through all of these years"
"you used to captivate me
by your resonating light
now I'm bound by the life you left behind
your face it haunts
my once pleasant dreams
your voice it chased away
all the sanity in me"
that's self-explanitory...
"i've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
but though you're still with me
i've been alone all along"
and yea, that is about her sister's memory... -
anonymous Jul 28th 2006, 21:58 report
It's about a woman who has a child with a guy whom she really loved. He is dead and gone, and she is still bound to him. She won't let go, she still has him in her head, and he is her only love.
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This interpretation has been marked as poor. view anyway
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Evanescencefreak Aug 12th 2006, 23:00 report
I do think this song could be about her sister Bonnie, and how she died, and how she can't forget that day wehn her sister died. And the memory haunts her, evrywhere she goes.
"you're face it haunts
my once pleasant dreams"
and how she'll never get over the fact that her sister is gone.
"these wounds won't seem to heal"
again, that's just my interpretation. -
anonymous Aug 17th 2006, 19:53 report
Its about someone being in love with someone, but they can't have them. This person made a huge impact in their life, and they are always still apart of it so it's not like they can just erase them from their mind, because they are awlays there. And it's more of the angry side of that, telling that person to just go away. It goes with what that person said about the director and knowing the director.
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anonymous Sep 30th 2006, 10:15 report
It's about Amy Lee failing to let go of a lost love. She is alone though this person is still with her in a ghostly form in the heart.
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anonymous Oct 13th 2006, 17:51 report
I think that the story of this song is that this one girl/boy loved this other boy/girl but the other would never act like they loved them, they would say I love you too" but never convinsing, then one day, the one person (one not showing the love) moves away. The other one can't believe they left and they still feel them there until they're so sick of it that they want them to leave, for good, because they realised they never really had that person and had been "alone all along".
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anonymous Nov 8th 2006, 15:40 report
Ben moody (a co-founder of evanescence, along with amy lee, but ben left the band at october, 2003) wrote the lyrics and the piano for this song. It was one of evanescence's first songs, and was supposed to be on their first ep, but they decided to remove it as a last minute change).
The lyrics are totally fictional and are based on a movie moody saw. There are no connections to god, and amy lee did not participate in writing it, originally at least.
The original version had some different lyrics:
after "suppressed by all my childish fears" came two more lines -
"I would give every breath from my chest
to give you all the things that my mind could bear"
and, instead of "i've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone but though you're still with me, I've been alone all along" it was -
"I love to walk away
by myself out of the rain
but I can't leave without you
i love to live without the constant fear and endless doubt
but I can't live without you"
there are 5 versions of this song. The original, which is the evanescence ep outtake version (the piano is not that good there, there are just chords and the voice of amy), the origin version (advanced piano, background vocals [by amy and david hodges], some effects and the voice of amy), the post origin demo version (more advanced piano, background vocals by amy, some effects, strings and the voice of amy, the chorus is a little different than earlier versions), the fallen version (same as the origin version, only with strings added), the band version (same as the post origin demo version, only all of the choruses are like the last chorus of the post origin demo version and the rest of the band joins at the end with the drums, guitars, bass and everything) and the no strings band version (same as the band version, only with no strings). (thanks, phistuck - snack!:), israel, for all above)
amy lee can probably relate to most of the lyrics as her 3-years-younger sister bonnie tragically died when she was younger. (thanks, ryan - east midlands, england)
terry balsamo, former guitarist of the band cold, replaced ben moody on guitar for this album. Moody went on to work with avril lavigne.
↓ More My Immortal meanings below the jump ↓
More Evanescence song meanings »
My Immortal lyrics
My Immortal is considered:
Songs about Death
Emotions: Sad Songs
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