Smashing Pumpkins: Disarm Meaning
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And cut you like you want me to
Cut that little child
Inside of me and such a part of you
Ooh, the years burn
I used to be a little boy
So old in my shoes
And what i choose is my choice
What's a boy supposed to...
nodoubtjd11 Jul 19th, 2007 7:28pm report
As someone who was abused and who is now a father there is something in me that is hard to put into words.
Father abuses son, son abuses his son and it is passed on and on. I hate what it is in me, that is in you, and a child is cut. Year after year in continues to consume all it touches, bitterness and denial consuming and causing hate that gets passed on like a sickness until it is disarmed with a smile by someone who understands it. I see the rage and know what it is and I smile and it cannot touch me because I choose to make it so. I pass the smile over to my son, my love, and the killer in me kills no more. I choose to live my own life and teach my son to fear no more.
anonymous Jan 23rd, 2011 1:04am report
Ok here is my personal line by line breakdown on the "meaning" behind "disarm".
"Disarm you with a smile."
Taking the power away from the abuser. They want you to hurt, they want power over you. Smiling into the face of the abuser "disarms" them. It takes away thier power over you, which is of course FEAR
This next line is a little more complicated as it uses 1 single sentence to relate 2 seprate but related thoughts. Please bear with me.
the first - "Cut you like you want me to cut that little child..."
(his strike back at the abuser,the first break in the repeating the cycle)
"that little child... inside of me thats such a part of you"
(the abuse of your own flesh and blood, how could you!)the pause after the word child is an artistic pause to create a dual meaning where the end of one thought is also the beginning of the next
"The years burn"
(Time goes by but pain dont stop. Burning Emotions of pain from within like a pressure cooker)
"I used to be a little boy , so OLD in my shoes"
(the abuse forced him to grow up long before he ever should have.)
"leave you like they left me here, to wither in denile"
(no one did anything, he was all alone, dying from the lies woven by the abused to protect the abuser)
"bitterness of one who left alone...ohh the years burn"
(the bitterness created by feeling you have allowed this to happen, self imposed isolation. Many people feel they "let" abuse happen, even when they have no control of it. Its how the mind "accepts" whats happening)these thoughts constantly burn inside scaring deeply)
"what i choose is my voice"
(breaking the silence)
"whats a boy supposed to do"
(stay silent or not)
"the killer in me is the killer in you"
(the abuser and the abused are tainted by the abuse. It was passed on. the abused becoming the abuser...)
(The love for the abuser (stockholms syndrome))
'send this smile over to you x4"
(breaking the cycle, "disarming it" as he did the abuser)
Anyhow, thats what it says to me, Thats the great thing about music. Its a customized message to every ear.
anonymous Jul 9th, 2017 7:34am report
It's a great tune. Just leave it at that.
anonymous Jun 8th, 2017 6:57am report
The song's author and lead singer Billy Corgan was quoted in an interview about "Disarm" as saying, "I never really had the guts to kill my parents, so I wrote a song about it instead." When he wrote this song, he was at a point where he was really angry at his parents for always making him feel lower than he really was.
What meant to the writer.
anonymous Jun 7th, 2017 6:54am report
Would have to agree with earlier post... Song referencing his childhood interfering with his current relationship and how it's killing his significant other too,who is putting up with his childhood issues (unbeknownst to her) in their relationship. he disarms her with his smile (leading her to believe all is well and she lets her guard down). Buts it's the denial (unintentionally) of his connection to his childhood that is destroying both of them.
This interpretation has been marked as poor. view anyway
anonymous Jun 30th, 2012 6:41pm report
The killer in me is the killer in you. Child abuse is soul killing. The child who is abused often becomes self destructive and destructive in relationships until they can resolve what they've been thru. Often a person who has been abused as a child becomes involved in abusive romantic relationships. So now he finds a destructive element in himself and his relationships even tho as an adult the abusive parent is absent. He was old in his shoes. Loss of innocence caused by the abuse. He became cynical, hardened by the pain he endured. He is singing this song to his Love. He is trying to understand the pain in his relationship with his Love. He is trying to keep his past from destroying his future. He is trying to have a voice thru making different choices. He sends this smile over to her. This nugget of understanding he is trying to share with her that he wants a future with her that isn't scarred by his past.
anonymous Jun 16th, 2011 6:56am report
or it could be rough childhood from abuse from a stranger. a guy the child didn't know. i'm not talking about billy. there are many kids today that get abused more by total strangers than their actual parents.
Played this song at a nice acoustic jam not long ago nodoubtjd11 how powerful. Just read your interpretation with my son and we were talking about father to son cycles passing through this universe taking on the previous teachers bad habits and continuing until the cycle is broken. It can be delivered on all scales I think. Mankind is very much like this. We keep F#$King up until someone breathes some light on the subject and teaches us a new way. Hard to learn new ways when its the only thing you know how. Takes a big person to stand up and face his demons in the face and change for the better. Peace to you all take care and thanks for the enlightenment cheers!
anonymous Mar 26th, 2010 3:12pm report
I believe the line - Disarm you with a smile - is about how his father would lull the child into a false sense of security, making it easier to "cut you like you want me to"
anonymous Sep 15th, 2009 9:44pm report
While this is not what I believe to be the purpose of this song, it seems to have a strong first amendment element to it.
Particularly the lines, "What I choose is my choice...What I choose, is my voice...the killer in me is the killer in you."
The first two lines above demonstrate the importance of choice and expression, while the latter seems to be stressing that everyone is capable of producing the same dark ideas and thoughts, so one should not be so critical of such views and these thoughts should be protected.
anonymous Jun 16th, 2009 6:43pm report
Really, the songs about a trip that SP took after their third tour
it was about how they came across a field of rabbits, and went hunting
they caught the first one, cut it open, then used the skin of it to catch the others by putting a "smile " on its face, to disarm the other bunnys into thinkin theyd get free sex from it
but things when horribly wrong when they accidentally stabbed maradeth shea, the elusive hidden 5th member of the band
they realised what a terrible deed they had done, and decided to hide the body in the mound of dead corpses of rabbits that had ammounted
seriously people its a great song, but when you read too much into any great song, it becomes a merely average song
leave the interpretations to the writers
Rock On SP
anonymous May 15th, 2009 5:18am report
I know that this is going against many interpretations of the song - but this is mine. I agree with all of the thoughts that this is about an abusive childhood, and I am not going against that.
but, everything I listen to the song- I always believe that it is about losing the innocence a little child has. This could also string in with an abusive parent theory. However I strongly believe that it is about losing innocence.
anonymous Apr 10th, 2009 4:39pm report
What Sophie wrote is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point during her rambling incoherent nonsense was she even remotely close to anything that might resemble a rational thought. We are all dumber for having read her entry. I award her no points and may God have mercy on her soul.
anonymous Feb 27th, 2009 2:48am report
"It's about trying to kill the pain brought about by his parents (especially his father since he abused him) when he was a boy." ok what you said is correct but Billy was abused by his step mom when he was a kid not his dad just sayin
"Disarm you with a smile. And cut you like you want me to.
Cut that little child. Inside of me and such a part of you.
Ooh, the years burn."
"Disarm you with a smile." means the child attempted to convert the father's attitude by smiling and doing good. "Cut you like you want me to" means to agree with the father's opinion. "Killer in me is the killer in you" means that it is expected that the child agree with the father's opinion and carry out his expectations.
"Disarm" means to change the child's outlook. "Cut you like you want me to" means to convert the child's viewpoint to the father's distorted outlook. "Inside of me" means you are just like him [the father]. "Ohh, the years burn" signifies the years of pain suffered by the child from the father's distorted expectations.
"What's a boy supposed to do"? means that it is ultimately up to the individual to decipher right from wrong.
I too have come from an abusive background and can relate to this song. However, I understand that I should not play the victim role. I should treasure and appreciate the family that care about me.
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