The Offspring: Kristy, Are You Doing Okay? Meaning
Kristy, Are You Doing Okay? Lyrics
And it's stuck in my mind
Way back when we were just kids
Cause you're eyes told the tale
Of an act of betrayal
I knew that somebody did
Oh, waves of time
Seem to wash away
The scenes of our crimes
For you this...
anonymous Aug 5th, 2008 8:35pm report
I think this song is a real sad one.
It starts with the thoughts of a narrator:
"There’s a moment in time
And it’s stuck in my mind
Way back, when we were just kids
Cause your eyes told the tale
Of an act of betrayal
I knew that somebody did"
He is remembering himself when he was a young child, maybe 7 or 8 years old from my guess. He had a close friend named Kristy. At one point in time, she started acting funny, like something was wrong. The narrator knew someone did something to her, but he doesn't know what or who.
"Oh, waves of time
Seem to wash away
The scenes of our crimes
But for you this never ends"
Over the years, he sort of forgot about what happened to Kristy, but because it happened to her and not him, she will never be able to put it in the back of her mind and almost forget about it like the narrator was able to.
"Though the marks on your dress
Had been neatly repressed
I knew that something was wrong
And I should have spoke out
And I’m so sorry now
I didn’t know
Cause we were so young"
Now that he is older, the narrator is finally realizing that is friend Kristy was possibly abused/raped/molested by someone. Her dress was torn and restitched. However, just because her dress was fixed, doesn't mean her life can be so easily. He knew something was wrong back then, but he didn't know what, so he didn't tell any adult about it, and now he is so sorry that he didn't.
"Can you stay strong?
Can you go on?
Kristy are you doing okay?
A rose that won’t bloom
Winter’s kept you
Don’t waste your whole life trying
To get back what was taken away"
Now he has gotten in touch with Kristy again after all the years. He is asking her about what exactly happened all those years ago, and asking her if she is alright, if she will recover okay. He then tells her to try and forget about it like he did, and to not attempt to gain her virginity back and waste her life being miserable.
HowCouldYou May 27th, 2009 5:12am report
My closest friend that knows my actions but sometimes does not believe my words and sometimes hides behind them had something happen to her
when I was young, I had lost my father, that was unable to stay clear of the drugs and women, I watched him seduce and it was not subtle and
the women and the drugs seemed to appear from nowhere, I saw him with another woman and he saw me close the door in a hurry, he came out and
yelled at me, got physical, basically beat me into submitting and to promise not to open that door again, I did not cry, and he knew it was
not my fault but still was confused by my rebellion, my lack to cry, I was told to stay there and be quiet, not ask questions and play, and
took out my frustrations on that table, focused all my energy into getting red and white balls to dance for me and make noise to silent the
sounds I was told not to hear but they still played back no matter how hard I hit them, another time, I was left by myself to dig around in
the dirt, the show was around the corner, but I could not go with him and while he was gone, a friend of his offered me a drink, I was
thirsty, he said hey are you thirsty and I did not trust him, he said it was ok and I drank, it was different from anything I had had before,
and I drank more, it was good and I wanted more and I was not allowed to have anymore for many many years and eventually forgot that it had
ever happened or at least the fine details I swore to myself that I would remember, the dates and the places and evil faces that offered me
such sweet graces, the last thing he told me was take care of your mother and that was it, no more hoping I got to spend time with him and
go places and see and experience things I had never before that scared me into believing I could die with just one blink of an eye, no more
adventure, a couple years went by, my playfriends started treating me odd, telling me I did not act right, secluded me and picked on me for
something I had no clue, to young to understand why I could not see why they picked on me, but they did and they called me names and when
we played and I made mistakes because I was angry or nervous and refused to focus to figure out what it was that they were so mad at me about,
and if I did it wrong enough they could blame me for something I could understand, no one else did or refused to explain, and near the end of
that time I was almost severely beaten, the group was ready, but I reached the most reliable trusted member, I cried and begged but that did
nothing and basically told him I had no idea what they were doing or why and I think he really believed me, and I felt safe but threatened
by death in the same moment, a trip to cali with my grandparents one of blood and a boy approached me as I layed in the sidewalk so warm it
felt so good and he asked if he could show me something after I told him how much I liked the warm feeling of the ground where people walked,
soon he was trying to get me to take my shorts off and I had to put on my anger face and forced him away and acted crazy and barked like a
dog, he finally left saying stupid stuff like he could have shown me something great and he would be back tomorrow to show me if I changed
my mind, I cried and showed her I was upset, but could not explain, thought I was mean for acting so crazy to someone that simply wanted to
show me something and felt guilty for wanting to know what that something was, and was told to talk to her when I was ready but I told her
I could not, I knew I could not tell her, and it was like I figured out how I could explain myself as to what happened and tried to replay
the situation with the roles reversed and the prey was a young girl, so young she could hardly talk, I saw that her family had left her to
play outside and I approached her and began to try to impress her with loving words and then undress her, and she fought me off and cried
really loud such a sudden shrilling and yet, even when her family came out and saw what I was doing, I continued to try to remove her little
dark blue dress is the color correct now not sure must be repressed but that was not my real intention now was it or was it, grandpa was
suddenly depressed and locked himself in his room for days, how could you do that I remember they were saying, I stayed quiet, they did
not want to listen before, and now they do, how dare they, not like I could explain anyway, was told to apologize, had no idea why since I
was proud of what I had done and felt sure that I would do it again, I really wanted to finish, to find out if I could figure out what it
was that I could have been shown.
the apology went on deaf ears, no reaction at all, nothgin,
anonymous Nov 19th, 2019 11:22am report
I relate to this song so much. I was raped at the age of 15.He took away my choice of who I give my virginity to. My innocence was taken away. I have been trying all my life to piece myself back together. Lately it has been getting harder instead of easier. The line "But for you it never ends" hits me. Being raped has taken away my life. I was diagnosed with PTSD, and it is becoming harder for me to move forward. I hope one day I can free myself of it.
anonymous Feb 22nd, 2016 2:08pm report
As a father of 3 daughters and a victim myself I heard this song for the first today. I new exactly what this song meant the first time I heard it. I concur that the molestation of children makes me so angry I could put my fist through any adult that does it. In reality this song makes me weep uncontrollably.
anonymous Feb 11th, 2011 2:15am report
Dexter holland said himself it's about sexual coercion and molestation. In the lyrics it talks about an act of betrayal, meaning from a family member.
The winter kept her meaning she will always be cold and withdrawn, and never blooming means she will never feel the same when she fails in love, like everyone else does.
It's truly sad, and as a future father it enrages me that someone would dare lay a hand on a child in that manner.
anonymous Sep 1st, 2009 9:25pm report
kristy didnt just loose her virginity, she also lost her innocence. it says so right in the song...oh clouds of time seem to rain on innocence left behind...
i think in the part were it says a rose that wont bloom, winters keept you refers that kristy was feeling sad inside and never really "bloomed".
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