Evanescence: My Immortal Meaning
Song Released: 2003
My Immortal Lyrics
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is...
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The song as a whole is about loss (as everybody else has already said).
Analyzing each verse, we can see the specifics:
"I'm so tired of being here, suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave
Your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone"
When she talks of her childish fears, it seems to me she would be talking about fear of death. The presence she means is the thoughts she still has of her loved one. She wants the memories and thoughts to go away so that she can feel better, but in this way she is not properly moving on.
"These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase"
This loved one was very dear to her, and though it's been a long time, she still feels immense grief. She feels like time will not make it any better.
"When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me"
This chorus makes it sound almost like the person she is grieving was very sick, that she stayed with them throughout their hardships and possibly through mental/physical breakdowns ("wipe away all of your tears/fight away all of your fears/held your hand though all of these years").
"You used to captivate me by your resonating light
Now, I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me"
She is remembering, at first, the person she lost. This person was obviously very close to her, and she still feels deep love for them. But now she feels haunted by their past, that their death is somehow her fault. She sees them everywhere, hears them everywhere. She's going mad with grief.
So that's what I hear. In basic, her unidentified loved one was deathly ill. She tried to help them fight through it, and stayed with them the entire journey, but they lost the battle. She now feels that she should've done more. She wishes that their presence in her life, the hole characterized by their absence would just leave so she could have peace. -
I think this song is about a woman who has finally gotten out of a violently abusive relationship, but he still lingers in her mind and the pain that he has caused her is so great that she can't identify who she is anymore. She is so depressed and hurt that she is a completely different person than she ever was. When Amy says "I've been alone all along" that especially makes me think of my parent's divorce. My dad was and still is very abusive to my mom and siblings and I, and even though he is gone, we still feel the pain and suffer the aftermaths of what his anger and actions have done to us and our lives. This song makes me cry whenever I hear it. Beautifully written <3
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What I am about to write won't be real popular and I actually agree with the other interpretations over my own as to the meaning of the lyrics that the author wrote and intended to mean. When I heard this song for the first time I was living deep in my own sin and running from God to fulfill those sins. To me this song is a prayer of me talking to God and Him talking to me.
(Me crying to God,)
"I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone"
I'm so tired of being miserable in my own sin that I keep chasing that keeps leaving me empty and broken over and over and back in the same place of shame,
Suppressed by my childish fear and running from Jesus like a child who won't come clean to his parents in fear of punishment.
And if you have to leave me I would understand and if you have to I wish you would just get it over with,
Cause your presence still lingers here and I know what is right yet I choose wrong and the guilt and shame I feel just wont leave me alone.
"These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase"
These wounds that I have tried to fix myself and make go away with anything and everything won't seem to heal,
This pain is just too real, though I look ok on the outside, inside it is almost unbearable,
There's just too much that time cannot erase; things that I have done that no matter how much time goes by I am ashamed to my core.
(God crying to me)
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me
(Me crying to God)
You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me
You used to captivate me by your resonating light. This was a time when I was so overjoyed to serve Christ and he filled my heart and life with more blessing than I ever asked and a loving fire that seemed to light my soul.
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind. Me wondering if I'm left to live the rest of this life in this condition as if he has left me and went to the future patiently waiting for me on my day of death to judge me.
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams. The Lord I love and was full of joy at the thought of seeing Him at one time has now become fear of seeing Him.
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me......obvious with my interpretation of this song.
(me crying to God)
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along
To me this song is very personal and speaks to me in that way. I know it was never meant like that but to me will always be for that particular time in my life. God bless -
This song has several meanings depending on where you are in your life. For me, it was a song that made me cry all the way home from work. My son died of a Drug Overdose and through the years I did wipe away all of his tears and he does still have "all of me",
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i think it's about a relationship with God.
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I heard its about her 5 year old whom she lost to a horrible disease. Not quite sure if that's true. But after hearing that the song is def deep.
-
I mean.. if this was not written by Amy Lee, it's just about a relationship.
and probably Amy liked it, because it reminded her of her sister. I dont think this could have written for that kind of lost, like the death of someone you love. I think that if that was the case, this lyrics would be darker.
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I love this song I have often writen the lyrics out to get me through my bad days.
To me its about being in a really bad relationship that you know you should leave but cant or dont. Its about giving until it hurts and giving again. I have cried as I listen and think "what else do I have to do for you"?
from the beginning "childish fears" the thought of being alone keeps me in a loveless relationship. And my favorite "though your still with me Ive been alone all along" have you ever laid next to someone and felt as though no one was there? this song describes my co-dependent 19 year relationship,songs come and go but this one is one that stays in my top 10 all time favorites. -
Firstly, the song is not about death. It is clear when she states that if you want to leave than just leave,meaning if you don't want to be with me than take all of you I don't want the memories nor the thoughts of you.
heres a breakdown of each verse
I'm so tired of being here, suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave
Your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone
shes tired of feeling hopeless and miserable. Her childish fears do not mean childish as in when she is a child it means she is afraid of change and what the future may bring which is a child state of mind. She is stuck in what was, rather than what is.
These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
time doesn't heal everything. The time and love she had and spent with him cannot be erased
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
she is basically resenting everything because she feels she did everything for this person she loved and he didn't appreciate or he just didn't acknowledge all theyve been through and everything that she did before he left.
You used to captivate me by your resonating light
Now, I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me
shes saying that she loved everything about him and loved seeing his face but now she wants his face and the memories of him to stop haunting her..his memories are driving her insane
These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
time doesn't heal everything...her wounds and the time she spent are just too deep
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
x2
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me, I've been alone all along
she tried to tell herself that he's not coming back to heal but it doesn't work...his memories are still with her but his heart is not thus the alone part
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me, me, me
even though they are not together her heart is still in love with him and she can't move on -
I think this song is about a dead person that was near to the protagonist. She doesn't want to believe that person is gone forever and so she imagines that he/she would still be with her, or maybe he/she is actually still with her as a ghost.
She wants to forget, but the memories are too beautiful to let them go. -
This interpretation has been marked as poor. view anyway
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I also jus read the idea that maybe the song is about amy herself. That is also a wonderful idea and makes a lot of sense. There are many good ideas about this song. I think thats why i love evanescence so much cuz most of her songs many can relate to one way or another.
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I dont see how this song can be written to her at all. I can see maybe if she moved away but theres still the line "and though ur still with me" that breaks the whole theory. I always thought this had to do with someone you love passing away. But I absolutely love love love the idea of an abusive parent or mentally ill parent especially sense that would be the level i can relate most on.
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Okay, Ben Moody wrote this song for Amy Lee, i dont know if he did it after the divorce... Because if it did, you'll notice that it sounds better if a GUY is singing it to the GIRL, like if he's APOLOGISING... no seriously think of it, If you have to "LEAVE" i wish if you would just leave, i dont know if i typed that right, JUST THINK OF IT!
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